I didn't mind getting the stomach flu from him. we had great sex AND I'm seven pounds lighter
i just sold a bong and some oregano to fifth graders for sixty dollars. doing something tonight?
He puked at the bar then immediately procceded to slip in it, they loaded him up into a wheelchair, then the staff and myself walked him outside, all the while never having to pay for our tab. SO using this strategy again
The best part is that he made someone stop their workout to take pictures of him, specifically so he could put them on facebook. That is an unparalleled level of douchebaggery.
I can't think of anything besides pubic hair fallout. Ugh.
He kept his baseball cap on when he went down on me...
Well if all fails we can always become surrogate mothers. I hear that pays well.
Chapter 6 - how to lose your underwear in chicago
Juss got out of jail; shes still in there tryin to sing her abc's backwards bc the cops neva asked her too... Whebever she gets to t she starts singin the tequilla song
i've created a new STD.
He said he didn't want to go down on me so I told him we were going to have an oral stalemate.
sometimes you just have to listen to beyonce and cry. that's how life works
fyi my negative pregnancy test is taped to the fridge...i'll take it over an A+ any day. be proud.
He was cute in a Sketchy-trying-to-sell-you-a-vaccum-at-9-at-night kinda way.
I didn't mean that as an expression. I'm literally asking if you want to watch Netflix and do nothing.
Randomize