Ok seriously, can we bring back badminton?
fighting downstairs. join me tonight to hear their makeup sex. also, let's make skittles vodka.
Iced coffee. Banana. Two dumps. Life is good.
I wish they made helmets for livers.
i've been fucking this guy since february and just found out he might be uncircumsized. currently google image searching to confirm.
At least she'll always have a story about the time she showed up to the emergency room drunk and covered in chocolate syrup on her birthday.
Passed out on the bench in the men's bathroom. Feel much better now.
you are dancing on the line between undergrad and alcoholic.
I'm going to give blood tomorrow. Prepare yourself for pictures and a cynical poem about the heart and its level of tangibility.
He also told me he would eat mozzarella sticks before having sex with me so I'm mad at him.
I'm scared because his knowledge of star trek is turning me on
My greatest accomplishment today was eating a box of Thai food the size of a toddler.
What happened?
New Orleans
Every time
Last night I recall my hair going up in flames. This is evident by the burnt hair smell that is following me around this morning
If I don't get alcohol poisoning from tonight I don't think i ever will.
Randomize
