She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
just saw my sister at the strip club... dont think she's "taking a night class over the summer"
Just cleaned up my puke with my lecture notes.
I had to ask him for the scissors while I was in the shower. My hood piercing was stuck in my loofah.
I know. I almost started crying. IN WHAT UNIVERSE IS THAT A TURN ON?!
Chugged a beer while being walked to the bathroom by campus police to pour the beers out.
Say what you want, but those Fraggle Rock DVDs have gotten me laid twice.
I took 36 pictures of my lava lamp. your weed wins.
Also can you rate on a scale of zero to jesus restraining order christ how creepy it is that he found a porn star that looks like me and has watched all the porn that she's been in
he'll always be the guy that i fucked on the bathroom floor
Well at least ssomeone is or the state is tafing over ir in twligiob
Fuck you and fuck your stupid hat
I haven’t taken my socks off in over 36 hours. I should add that to my bumble profile.
I should probably apologize for licking you last night since you drove me home, but I stand by my decision
Skipping class. Wanna Drink now?
yea. just give me 15 min to write a paper.
Randomize