Dear yesterdays makeup, Thank you for always being there when I stay up late binge drinking on weeknights and am running late to work Friday morning. You're the best.
I want to spend time with you, and by time, I mean real time. Not your dick in my mouth time.
He told everyone he was going inside...an hour later we get a knock on the garage door from some dude telling us a guy is passed out on the lawn and we should get him inside because it's about to rain
Alright, so what's my next move? I already posted a Milli Vanilli video on her wall
We need to put it on a rope attached to the bong, so it can't be dropped. Apparently, you need a stem safety leash.
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
You took my underwater blowjob virginity.
I really shouldn't be this use to hearing "YOURE THAT GIRL?!?!"
I made him fuck me with my coat zipped up and a unicorn mask on. That level of drunk sex. Weird and creepy yet highly satisfying.
The bar would not accept my money. I have reached God status here
just ran into my drill sergeant from basic 4 years ago. gonna take him home and have him fuck me at the cadence of quick time.
And on a positive note i found a list that i made in 3rd grade titled "what to do if you want a guy to like you"
After 8 hours of circus trick sex, his parents are both hugging me and kissing me on the cheek asking when I'm coming back over. Score?
Im goin to jail bro ill talk to u sun
No problem...what are friends for if they can't rub eachothers genitals.
Randomize
