please. tell me to stop eating out of the trash.
Astroglide: It's like Bengay for your ass.
i keep walking around campus wondering if anyone is as stoned as i am
He's at the gym. He likes to get high and swim cause it makes him feel like a fish.
Lost is over, my longest committed relationship is coming to an end.
he had two deer mounted on his dorm room wall with panties and bras hanging from the antlers... i cant believe i contributed to bambi's headgear...
I'm doing this for my boobs. They miss him.
i'm not entirely sure that 'not getting kicked out of the bar until it got dark' really classifies as 'doing better'
What if this is the rest of my life? Sitting at the bar waiting for someone to play Single Ladies
Atlanta road trip update. Jimmy fell into the petting tank at the aquarium. And freaked out. With cops now... Keep you posted
Jesus, you make out with one twin then sleep with the other and suddenly they don't want to play soccer with you... So sensitive...
All I know is that I woke up with glitter all over me and blood on my shoes. It wasn't my blood.
I think i'm the first person to get kicked out of a club while completely sober. Come outside please!!
We had a moment of silence for all of the orgasms he gave me with his beard before he shaved it off.
I shit you not. Dude complemented me for being meme savvy. You could drown a toddler in my panties right now.
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