He like poked it twice with the tip of his tongue then left it alone. I'm sad.
Yeah...I know. It's cute I think...I mean cute in a weird like hey I kinda took you home from the bar one night, maybe criticized your penis, and fucked your brains out...kinda sorta way
it was either a cry for help or you were gargling vodka. we didnt care either way.
I slept with an Israeli and a Palestinian in the same day. It feels wrong.
I'm allowing myself one mistake a year. He gets to be 2012.
We're both great liars, in committed relationships, and horny. Its the perfect storm of cheating
Two women at the Safeway just got out of their separate cars and kissed. One was driving an outback, the other a CRV. It was like a Honda and Subaru had a lesbian joint venture and filmed the commercial in front of me.
Whoever put salsa in the kiddie pool.....your an ass. Fuck you.
I think anything that happens between 12 and 2 am is just sketchy enough to be a good idea.
I now have a bottom rung on my kissing scale. Like I can say "Well. On a scale of Matt to Braxton he was probably a Zach." It's the little things.
Sounds good. Look at us. Planning sex like proper adults.
He's probably the biggest I've seen outside of the porn I vehemently deny watching and he asks if I think he's too small
I stepped in puke last night then washed it off my shoe with beer. Is there a grace period to respect before wearing them to class?
I haven't been single on my birthday for 7 years. If you don't get me laid tonight, your best friend/wing woman status will be revoked.
I just caught your son trying to perform fellatio on himself. What do I do?
Randomize
