I don't hate you. My dick is upset with you, but I don't hate you.
do you think you could subtly ask him about the dimensions of his penis?
Thats the last thing I remember and then I woke up in this Dutch kids dorm and he was taking a picture of me while I was sleeping
From what I hear, her blowjob factory was runninng at full capacity this weekend.
Me and Phil are just drawing pictures of thumbs in different costumes during lecture. I love being a senior.
Is putting "Tonight I'm Fucking You" on my date playlist too forward?
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
Before we rave about the healing powers of your penis, remember it nearly killed me as well.
How do I tell your little brother I lost my virginity wearing nothing but his socks?
Formal letter or email.
I've officially dedicated my newly single life to making myself squirt.
I think I've done enough damage with my vagina as of late, thank you
I've officially slept through a hurricane, a tornado and had sex during an earthquake. I'm surviving.
It's a sad day when you're not really phased by the McChicken video only because you've seen weirder porn.
How is it that on the one day I'm just moving my car at 6:30 I get the walk of shame looks but when I come home at 9 am in a torn dress holding heels old ladies smile at me?
I'm gonna ask his dad. Weed trumps broken heart any day.
Randomize