I'll pay for our taxi if you let me makeout with the drummer and we don't leave RIGHT when the bassist does.
sex on the roof is not as easy as it sounds
i kinda regret how quickly i gave it up to him, but i just wanted the regular fucking to begin soon. ah we made good memories.
He's prob getting laid right now and I'm sitting alone in my duct tape shoes.
his mom gave me my lost underwear folded up along with the rest of my christmas present. tell me this cannot be happening.
you were crying and trying to give advice to people.. that's was a new level of drunk for you
he broke up with her mid blow job, and somehow convinced her to finish. I want his life
you called me in the middle of the night, wandering the streets, in search of "the ultimate burrito"
We had on the same team jersey so at the time it made sense to hook up.
Duh.
Party Liz is going to have to have her wings clipped until someone gets me some baby reins to wear
banged a milf last night. she left right after cause of parent teacher conferences this morning. victory.
Nothing makes the walk of shame as great as disapproval from a mom getting ready for work
Hey kevin, it's Ashlee. I have been trying to get ahold of you. Your pledge gave me your number. I really wanted to apologize for shitting in your car I'll buy new upholstery or pay to have it shampooed if needed. I'm so embarrassed.
We found you with your penis in the vacum hose crying softly...
when I found u, u were using a t-shirt for pants
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