Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
Walk of shame... his parents made me go to church with them first. in my club top sweat pants and slippers. i just slapped god in the face
I woke up to him eating me out, listening to classical music.
you really dont want me to drink and drive. you saw what i did to my face and that was only from walking
Doing lines and watching a show on hot dogs around the world ... Why do I do this to myself
I'm covered in mustard and it looks like I nose dived in to barbed wire ??? Was last night that good?
Come to wine Wednesday bro. We have a fog machine
My roommates call me "Queen of the Skanks" I guess that means I've had a successful first month of college.
College has done two things for me. Given me the confidence to blow my nose in public and shit in public
Well you should have thought of that before you were reckless with your butt
this is an emotional support booty call
He asked me who my new boyfriend was and I showed him a picture of my sex toys.
My mom just said we can't get married in nude body suits to look like earthworms. She's ruining my life.
Babe, Have you see my pants?
Try Jay street in Brooklyn.. that's where I last remember seeing them.
april was a good month for me, sexually...doubled my number, had a threesome, fucked a girl for the first time and two different boys in one night. there should be a medal
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