Hey, It's Lauren. i wanted to talk to you tonight. I like you, as you know because kyle told you. I was wondering if you liked me too?
Are you in the third fucking grade? Check yes or no.
Btw the nut in my hair goes great with my outfit !!! :(
just walked out of chelsea's house and saw cameron slapping his dick against her car. cant even make this shit up if i tried.
She said she couldnt do it today but shed make it up to me next week
stick it in her butt and if she asks, say that thats what you thought she meant
He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
i just turned the eviction notice into a beer pong list
Yeah, she tried to drown her but then they hooked up.
Flaming shots last night. Missing an eye brow. There a connection?
Dude if it is ever said "everybody get inside the police helicopter just showed up.". That means it was a successful party.
The fun I thought I would be having now when I was six is vastly different from what I am currently doing. Hurraaay sex and vicodin.
I danced with this guy last night, I left like I was humped by a blind baby kangaroo trying to body-box.
Do you remember lying across two tables saying 'go away I'm trying to pull' to me, Sollie and Sean?
Have you ever had chicken nuggets while high? Because it tastes like hearing the Beatles for the first time
CRAIGSLIST IS NOT THE ANSWER
IM LONELY AND HORNY
Jesus fucking Mary Christ if I have to clean shit out of my fucking bathtub one more fucking time I'm gonna murder a fucking kitten
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