id tell you what to do, but my morals dont exactly scream, "Listen to this guy!"
Ok a condom literally fell out of my underwear this morning, i have never been so confused.
he's got a countert top full of yard sale blenders so id say maragita wednesdays is a go.
maybe volvos are so family friendly and safe because they're extremely uncomfortable to get fucked on.
Note to self: do not ride giant beanbag chair down stairs.
I was screaming out for people to gather the townsmen and the mayor so we could hang him
At the same time that I bought plan b I got some Girl Scout cookies too. It's not a total loss for you.
Does the room smell any better?
Yeah, i sprayed perfume. It smells like Victoria's Secret, if Victoria's secret was that she was homeless.
I need a light and a towel. ive got cum in places ive never had cum before.
I feel like the first time i have to use my accident insurance its going to be in some sex mishap with you.
Sorry for trying to baptize you last night
You knew the entire thing in Latin I was so impressed
I have a story for you. It involves waffles and getting naked with the local weatherman.
We decorated the tree, drank wine, and he went down on me with Christmas music on in the background. Christmas IS coming.
Found your bra
Where?
Hanging in the tree
I got so pissed i stormed off and threw his burrito on his windshield
Randomize
