genius idea. im gonna paint my penis green like the serpent of sex
I learned to sign I want to be on you today
Score
Deaf chicks here I come
every time i get drunk at her place i end up leaving with nothing but an empty box of toaster strudels..
is asking a girl out on a date while in another girls bed in poor taste?
A freshman just referred to Home Improvement as 'tim the tool man show'. People born after 1990 are not people.
he was sobbing,drinking his beer, all while confessing his love for her. awkward was an understatement...
i feel this outfit says i'm better than you, but i might give you a handjob behind a building
As far as drugs go, alcohol has all the elegance and precision of hitting yourself in the head with a hammer.
He sent me a picture of his dick earlier so now we can all laugh at him tomorrow
I think I want to impress his gay best friend more than him..
She has dubbed herself the Pied Piper of Penis and keeps yelling about getting Cocktober started... Will send pix soon
I FINALLY GET TO MASTURBATE. SO EXCITED.
You're not gonna like every guy whose dick I put in my mouth
Had a dream I was doing scat with Caroline. I need to lay off the cheese at night
Its like the floor is slow but life is fast?
I see you found the nyquil...
Randomize
