Court Ordered Rehab!!! Do you think I'll need a swimsuit?
he ran me a hot bath. i thought i was in a pot and was going to be eaten. i was strangely ok with this
He put used condom on the handle of the plunger in the bathroom.
No, listening to the fray and drinking a bottle of jack daniels does not count as counseling
Most men with as many freckles as you aren't vagina magnets. You are an exception to your kind.
She had a cast on when I met her, but she blamed me for breaking her arm this morning. I'm gonna marry this girl.
Her boobs felt like beanie babies from heaven
Hootey the Owl eats a mean pussy.
Um, OK. WTF?
The guy from the Halloween party. We finally hooked up. Went down in me for 45 mins. Came 4 times.
you ate the make a wish sign. Like actually chewed on it. It was our solution to going outside when the cops were there
I immediately knew he was tripping, he came over with a grocery bag of snow balls and a bike helmet on and asked if I was prepared to die for my country.
I think that's why god made me a woman. Bc it's harder to slap people in the face with a vagina.
So you drank bourbon with cough syrup?
I still had a cough. It only makes sense
Just because you have put things in my vagina does not mean you know me
All I want to do is drink an excessive amount of free alcohol bought from strange men, while taking frequent trips to the bathroom to snort an assortment of illicit drugs off dirty toilet seats. Break cannot get here quick enough...
Is it good porn? Or is it more of that fucked up Cabbage Patch Doll porn you made us watch
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