This girl is more easily done than said...
also i tucked his toothbrush in my shirt. why? i dont know.
its a sex-hate relationship...no love involved
Eating Doritos is not nearly as enjoyable when I'm not drunkenly feeding them to peacocks.
I had to throw up. it was the only way to avoid kissing her after she swallowed..
She looks like a junkie muppet...awful
I HAVEN'T FUCKED ANYONE IN FOREVER AND A HALF I DON'T DESERVE TO BE A TRASHY BLONDE
I stuck my fake eyelashes to his balls after he passed out.
Oh my fucking god how fucking embarrassing never again will I mix drugs at a family barbecue
multiple people will be seeing my nips tonight. not mad about it at all
There's mini weenies and empanadas everywhere...
She doesn't believe I only want to use you for sex. She has a much higher opinion of me than either of us do.
Great news. I WILL BE FUCKING IN A BOUNCY HOUSE TOMORROW.
Am I supposed to get so horny by looking at your dick that I start orgasming uncontrollably
My history professo slid into my DMs. Granted I did give him “fuck me” eyes during a lecture a few times.
Randomize
