I haven't seen him in over a year. He asked me to his prom over myspace. Is he fucking serious?
She was kinda tragic... like a puppy that runs into things. Cute but really stupid. So, yeah, I hit it.
Drunk on Tuesday. Double fisting. Mmmbop is playing. Only girl in the group. Life is complete.
and I'm sitting five inches from the tv scrunched up in a ball watching doug. It's like I'm five again...except I'm more stoned than the dude who created this show
he can show you his cooooock\nshining, shimmering, splendiddddd
screw it, I'll just be a stripper until next August when then are looking for suitable teachers to teach the future of America. it's like a feel good movie just a little out of order and im a dude.
she slipped a pinky in my ass. Not sure if I came because I liked it or if I was terrified by it.
He chipped a tooth on the first beer. You know the night is just going to be a slushy mess after that.
Well its official, I'm into significantly freakier sex than even I thought possible.
We'll never be able to grow apart now. You can't look at a stranger & say "Yea I ate goldfish crackers off his dick." & just be casual about that.
Just watched my first Christmas porn of the year. Def have the spirit now
I am sure I don't wanna know but I have to ask... Why is there a kiddie pool full of jello in the living room?
its a recording of you guys having sex?!
its actually 30 minutes of him begging and then 2 minutes of sex.
He's making me do the dishes for the next month and half because I shit in the bath tub...
I just folded my laundry and I washed 3 pairs of underwear and 6 jizz towels. Clearly I'm quarantining right.
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