I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
broke, out of weed, out of gas, out of food, and my gf just left me.
you're writing country songs now?
Now I have to picture Dave Letterman having sex with all these women. Im the real victim.
just a heads up, there may or may not be a mailbox full of the leftover beer on the table in your basement.
I doubt the Taliban would support fake nipples.
After the VIP Latina experience at the strip club last night, I am rooting for Mexico in this years World Cup.
Just warning you now f you do not get intoxicated with me in front of the family on thanksgiving we are not related.
Saw you fall down on Jefferson and a cop drove by and shook his head. How you didnt get arrested after the party you went to on saturday is beyond me.
I just walked in on my lesbian roommate having sex in the kitchen, and it was awesome. We proceeded to shots naked together. Happy birthday to me.
I woke up smelling like chlorine with a broke toe. They know how to fucking party on lake lanier.
I feel like I got ass raped in the brain.
Check your mailbox. I left a "sorry I didn't have time to suck your dick today" consolation gift.
Same I threw up in 3 different cities already today
Actually we have similar relationship styles aka no relationship... it could work
Guy just walked into the bathroom with only socks on and took a 5second shit. It is taking me longer to type this than for him to shit, wash hands, and leave the bathroom. WTF? Still wondering why he only had socks on.
I am listening to Jack Johnson and wearing the sweater your Mother made me fuck mother nature I am in my happy place right now
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