My ass is singing 4 different tunes right about now... Taco Bell was a bad idea!
dude, despite what happened last night, I'm not gay
who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
I guess calling a coworker a lesbian sea cow is some kind of violation.
You seriously don't know?He was trying to arrest you and you were shouting that you were being punk'd. Punk'd? that show got cancelled like 5 years ago.
he said he wanted to butter my pancake. i thought it was sexual, but he went downstairs and made pancakes. i need to stop dating fat guys.
just found a carrot inside of a baby sock. living with toddlers is like living with tiny hammered people.
A friday night jus isn't the same if the cops don't raid my dorm
i licked icing off his dick. in front of his sister.
Don't underestimate her when she starts going by "the vodka queen"
I GOT A VENDING MACHINE FOR OUR LIVING ROOM
Is a 'Dr. Willy Fister Gynecologist' costume appropriate for work?
You came out of your room naked under your open robe with a mouth full of brownie on a stick and grabbed a fistful of fruit loops and shoved them into your already full mouth.
her fuck buddy was butt ass naked in our kitchen making waffles but they tasted so bomb
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