Im at strip club and am horny
Alli causes anal leakage. You can find someone to like you if you are fat but no one will like you if you poop yourself.
found: crazy homeless guy quoting Quagmire lines to every chick he sees. i think i win the scavenger hunt.
I hate when people I sell to add me on Facebook. I'm your dealer, not your friend, C'mon people.
That was the scariest sex i've ever heard....
It was the best sex i've ever had.
Weird question, would you want to do fetish porn? you get paid.
apparently he couldn't remember my name so he refereed to me as whats-her-boobs and everyone knew that it was me he was talking about
The bouncer at this strip club is my new best friend. He is also very persuasive. He got me to strip onstage for a t shirt. It's a nice shirt.
And after getting thrown out of the frat house, getting carried up the hill for a half an hour, puking 5 times, and almost getting stopped by campus security, she still insisted he sleep with her. Gotta give her credit, even blacked she kept her eyes on the prize
Im cutting you off tonight ONE boy at a time
I'm gonna try Jim's breakup remedy this weekend.
Is that the one where you drink 3 cases of beer and rewatch as much WWE RAW as you can find? Or the one where you hookup with fatties on Craigslist?
you don't understand it took me an hour and a half to escape that bed, I had to memorize his sleeping patterns.
Quick question, did I crash teeth with you when I snogged you, or did I headbutt something between the car and the bed last night?
I haven’t sent any nudes yet in 2018.
That’s not true...is it?
I don't mean to alarm you but are the strongest testicles in the family. I just learned I can lift 90 lb with my balls! Beat that.
Randomize
