in a basement doing blow off a prince dvd next to a chick in a saddam mask
There is a distinct lack of front teeth here.
she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
Just so you know, coffee creamer+water does not = milk.
Saying he's good in bed would be like saying Soulja Boy is a good rapper, completely unlogical if you've heard him.
The fact that you think you peed off a roof shows you shouldn't have been on a roof.
It wasn't a threesome, it was me making out with one while looking at the other one screaming "does this make you jealous?"
dude, i turned on the light and asked if they were ok and they STILL didn't stop. Most determined sex EVER.
Also, we accidentally donated a bong to goodwill
Who knew that the guy I fucked on your front lawn during welcome week freshman year would turn out to be my husband
They made up a new version of "Smash or Pass" called "I would(n't) let you sit on my face" to yell at the freshman
i think it’s okay to see him. you just can’t wind up with his penis in your mouth again
well you did quote socrates while playing beer pong and then proceeded to fall down
Love it. I wish you see me right now. I'm counting cash on my bed with no shirt on, beauty and the beast sound track on blast. Fucking creepin it up.
I just ran into my psychology professor at Planned Parenthood she asked why I was there and I asked why she was there and it turns out we both had a scare.#bonding because of abortion.
Randomize
