Maybe I lied like you did about your herpes.
In Vegas, have spent the last 48 hours wearing a viking helmet and fanny pack. I consider this to be a career high since drinking is my career
What can i say im a girl who smells like weiners.
I didn't know it was possible to make picking up dog shit look sexy.
She did the bend and snap...
he was already passed out before we got there, so i already knew i was going to like him
its totally unfair that im just as ill-prepared as a 16 year old but there's no tv show for 25 and pregnant.
I just figured you know how to drive a boat and I know how to get drunk. What can go wrong
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
You christened everyone with a powdered doughnut and then tried to absorb vodka with your nipple.
When you turn your data bak on you're gonna get a pic of a nipple but it's not mine
You threw up in your own shoe then wore it home
I'm asking you this because you're my dad....is coke a drug I should try?
at that point, I wouldn't blame you because I'd be so ashamed I couldnt even have sex with myself.
Can I just go naked and covered in glitter?
If he has a beard, chances are, that’s an open invitation to sit on his face
Randomize
