Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
a slip n slide in 50degree weather was the 2nd dumbest thing i have ever done. the 1st was hitting the wooden fence i believed was supposed to "help us stop"
just saw a girl who had one of those monogrammed backpacks... her initials are VAG. is this a sign?
I remembered to bring wine in a nalgene bottle, but I forgot sunscreen and water. I'm starting to question my life decisions.
it felt like i was a kid in an empty playground. i fucked him on every piece of furniture in the house and then when his housemates showed up i was naked in his bed like i'd been there all along.
The dorm caught on fire so it turned into a 5am pool party
I literally just biked home like I was on the last leg about to win the tour du France. Fuck diarrhea
Shotgunning beers to finish a midterm project at 3am is a good idea right?
She had pubes that could make an episode of Duck Dynasty. Fear the Vag Beard
I've decided that it's a bad thing. But I've also decided that I don't give a fuck.
Remember when I got punched in the face on NYE last year? I don't
There should be a Doritos delivery van or something.
If me saying "come f***k me now" is talking, then yes.
I have a burn on my hand, I'm covered in bruises, I think my toe is broken, and I have no clothes to wear home.
admittedly, geting that drunk in front of my last two exes wasnt a good idea
probably didn't help that you cheated on them with each other either
Randomize
