Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
sexting loses it's worth when you accidentally text your boss.
I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
So my mom just called me into her room and showed me a condom wrapper she found in my room. "Oh that's from when I was like 16." I don't think that was very comforting.
I woke up in what appears to be a taco bell graveyard in my bed.
girl is pretty boring. i'm gonna see if she'll let me finger her.
Is it appropriate to get drunk, stand up at the wedding and make a toast to "the time the lovely bride asked me to come on her chest"?
our generation is not ready to get married
Maybe. This hangover is made of nightmares and that thing from the Alien movies.
He broke the bed, AND shit in the closet. What a way to lose his virginity. What a night.
You called me a pussy and continued to eat an entire jar of peanut butter with only your hand.
.As long as you're some how patriotic with your sexual escapades, I can support it.
He came over last night and as soon as we started having sex Siri announced "you've arrived at your destination." I think it was some kinda sign
Human centipede...with the teletubbies. That's what my nightmare had in it.
I don't even want to know.
I should come with a warning like "do not feed me tequila or cocaine, I will ruin the party and cry"
For real his Facebook page says he studied "sexual arts" at some random college I've never heard of. You've been warned.
Randomize
