Why were you high on a thursday?
today's a wednesday
I asked first.
Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
hahaha he is wasted in math class right now and is drawing all the planets in order from the sun
Some drunk couple just made out on the sidewalk and it reminded me some sweet moments we have shared...
I think im gonna bang this 35 year old at a kids birthday party in the bathroom at this house while the kids open the presents.
She just gave me a free latte.
Correction. She just have you a frothy, creamy path to that vagina.
I think my hand is broken. But his nose definitely is
Remember when we saw my neighbor taking dick pics of himself? He's back at it!
If you do that, i will make all sorts of uncomfortable comments about my nipples being soft
I'd rather not be labeled as that girl who came over, drank a bunch of their alcohol, woke up the 5 year old, broke shit and left
Best sex of my life. But I think it's because I like his apartment. Really nice bed sheets. High vaulted ceilings. I wanted to lay there forever.
You're getting old. Was it located in a nice school district for your future offspring?
Omg that was my second thought of the morning.
First was that we had pop tarts.
Lesson learned:nothing good comes from an at home wax kit.
No. No. Fuck you! You can do your own grocery shopping.
Like how do you live your life and have never made a grilled cheese? The audacity of some people
Randomize
