Do you think Capital One would let me put the Tub Girl picture on my Capital One card?
Beat you to it.
To think... Somewhere, too drunk by buckcherry is someone's theme song
doing washington apple shots with my mom. sunday afternoons suddenly got so much better.
the way i see it, im about one adderall binge away from graduating
it's like his penis is God's way of saying "sorry about his face"
just got tipped $5 to put a barbie in a waffle cone and drip caramel sauce on it while a group of dudes cheered and one took pics. 90% sure they were sober
The black hole just entered the party man, I can literally see guys starting to move towards her.
At second job interview this week. Wearing pants to hide pole dancing bruises. This my life.
Well we did eat French fries lady-and-the-tramp style last night...
then looked at this little girl next to me and was like "don't drink when you get older and don't let your best friend be with assholes." she looked at me like i was crazy
Nothing like cleaning out your cleavage from lunch, finding cookie crumbs and eating them...
Like, I want sex but I also would be okay with Netflix
One day I'll learn not to get drunk on a plane. Today is not that day.
Why thank you for your unwanted opinion, person I've never met before.
I’m on my third beer doing poppers in the shower to no doubt
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