So guess who had sex in a Ghostbusters sleeping bag.
She was really fucking loud. My neighbors definetly knew my name...
All I remember from last night is petting the broom with my feet and feeling like I was standing on a horses head
Can she stop putting up all these passive aggressive statuses and please come out of the "I-want-to-be-a-pornstar" closet already?
Haha, apparently they frown upon male strippers there. Bouncers couldn't catch me tho.
Well. I have your keys. You have my car. Looks like we have a drunkxican standoff.
I just saw a herd of slutty loofahs run down the street...
Someone downtown drunkenly stole the antenna off of her car... while she was driving.
He had "Bad Bitches Only" tattooed above his dick. I don't know his name but I hope I find him again. I also don't feel that I lived up to the challenge.
I'm like still hungover from the quinceanera.
I dunno I mean I feel like I owe everyone an apology except the two people I punched in the face
My brother is chasing tequila with vodka. Not sure how it will turn out, but I like his style.
I just my had my first cup of coffee in a week. I think I might orgasm.
Don’t say some truly stupid shit like that to me. In a kitchen. Where the knives are kept
whered you go
woke up in a ditch, shat infront of a little league game, slept in her stairway...i need to come here more often
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