How was your sisters wedding?
Oh, I didn't go. I slept through my alarm. I finally woke up and was like...I don't think so.
sisterhood ftl.
I just don't understand how my upright asian catholic roommate is getting more than me.
PS, you're not being slutty, you're "making dreams true."
Obama is so hot when he ends wars.
he brought me knee pads...is that sweet or weird?
Tomorrow, if I don't look at least 5% better than I do on a regular day to day basis, I want you to hit me and tell me that no one will ever love me if I continue to look like I just rolled out of a cocaine induced hibernation. I'm asking you for tough love.
I'm okay. We got a prayer rug sent to us with the face of jesus on it. From Tulsa Oklahoma. Kinda weird.
its amazing there are so many photos of me and him separately, since most of that party time was spent sneaking away to fuck upstairs...
I vaguely remember stopping for a bag of bugles and some lube and then I woke up this morning with melted chocolate on my hands. I think I love him
im actually so stoned and hungover i feel like a bag of jello stuffed into a human shape
We're all just looking at each other quietly, hoping that no one brings up last nights shenanigans.
It takes a special friend to go vibrator shopping with
Yes. It does.
also had sex in his sister's princess style bunk bed.
but you are a princess that one was appropriate.
You give an incredible blow job. I wanted to make sure you know it was appreciated
She was blacked out on the couch MASTURBATING and whispering to her boyfriend...who wasn't there. I yelled her name and she didn't even pause.
Randomize
