i just fell asleep at my computer and i woke up and in the google bar it said delicious foods to eat
two of my INSANE ex girlfriends just texted me saying their coming over because im home alone. needless to say, im deleting my twitter.
ISS teacher has a tramp stamp.
Shotgun.
i can't decided whether the fact that her nipples are bigger then her palms is a problem or not
soon, soon....
I don't believe you anymore. You're like the boy who cried coitus.....
I could just tape a camera with a live feed to my head & you could check in on me from time to time
saw a dude wearin soccer cleats at the bar tonight. fuckin kiddin me man?
I've never been so tempted to check my phone during sex in my life.
her fuck buddy was butt ass naked in our kitchen making waffles but they tasted so bomb
Your english degree would kill itself if it could read that text.
maybe a couloe typos.. noooooooooo big deal
My new favorite word is dickbag. I think its relevant here. And I say that with all the love in the world.
It was rocky mountain showdown of course we got shitfaced and talked about eating buffaloes
My mom found me this morning passed out, face down on my dinning room floor
That must have been one awkward situation haha
Well I woke up in my bed.... I don't remember her finding me
I literally ended up in this basement and was tangoing w my friend and then I peed in a supply closet and had to be put to bed
He agreed to matching Christmas pajamas today, no guy does that for a girl he’s not seriously considering marrying.
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