There are only two things that should be in vaginas... penises and vegetables
How do I put "special brownies" into Weight Watchers?
we went to the store to buy cookie dough and conditionally went straight towards the booze
i just got yelled at for having sex. this sorority thing is worst than being at home. at least at home they think im still a virgin
dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
Found a 10-can wizard staff hidden in our closet. Did we cut someone off?
That's yours. We cut you off.
You were so excited to be getting 4 tickets to the Whale Rodeo.... That high
It's hard to be judgmental of others when you are wearing silver pleather.
I just used a VHS tape as a plate for sanwich
We watched game of thrones, broke up and I drove away blasting ridin solo while he dougied
reason #326 why I'm still single.... my date just told me there's a little boy ghost that lives in his closet because he likes his music.
there is a guy with a glowstick staff outside my house
The guy I hooked up with last night left me alone with his dog AND IT JUST SHIT ON THE FLOOR. WHAT DO I DO
Me: I shouldn't go to the airport bar it's too expensive and I don't need it. Dark me: SHOTS AT 7 AM
When are you getting back?
Well google maps doesn't have an estimated time for crawling... Could be days
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