This is not my ceiling
evidently tequilla and lady gaga make me flirt and grind shamlessly with other men infront of my boyfriend.
What kind of poor, pathetic town do we live in where a horny teenage girl is sitting in her basement on a saturday night, unlaid?
Yes but life is bad with poopy sheets
she gave me a disgusted look and asked how i could live with myself. because i havent seen the rocky horror picture show. and then dumped me.
so i never found you. but i found vodka. so its kinda the same
can you explain how you are here for one night and now my kitchen table is in 11 pieces..
She looked at my facebook and decided to bump the security deposit up an extra 250...now we have to destroy the house, its expected and I wouldn't want to disappoint
Day drunk and a can of soup and wine straight from the bottle and alone and on my kitchen floor.
Sounds good! I plan on writing a book entitled: I've Probably Done Cocaine In Your Bathroom. A tell-all by Lauren.
I already googled the effects of Molly with my antibiotics, I should be fine.
Why is there even a knowledge base for that?!
There is is 40 year old penis staring me in the face right now if there was ever a time to be a good friend its right now.
4 people stoned, 3 boys I've slept with, 2 I gave chlamydia, and a partridge in a pear treeeeee
How festive
I walked in the kitchen and heard her saying "We could have been so good together" as she caressed an egg with her cheek.
I mean, who hasn’t been fingered in there back of an Uber?
Randomize
