he's a nude model. what could you have done to make him feel awkward??
Hopefully. Play it cool. Bust out a few jokes. Chew with your mouth closed and show your boobs.
Just because he's a soilder doesn't mean his dick is a hero.
i mean, some people chug beer and some people chug hard liquor. some people have good ideas and some people have bad ideas. it's all about perspective.
I've slowly been stuffing french fries down his pants. I'm at 31 and he hasn't even noticed.
It was fun, but I mean, any day that starts with shower tequila is bound to be good.
I've fucked 6 of my brothers' friends. I'm completely fine with him fucking the girl we ate lunch with.
Finals drinking + forgeting you had to take your ambien because you work at 6am mid paper= drunk logic which then entails going on a "detox" run. Puking your guts put in the field house bushes while some random guy says to you "its okay. We're marching on."
Is it okay to send him a "thanks for the sexual awakening" note?
I am one with the molecules
So I think my motto should be "losing bras and dignity every weekend" but like in a really amazing way
Knowing that porn stars want to fall in love is the weirdest thing I've found to be beautiful recently. I'm so lonely.
Some people are good at football, some people are good at painting, and he's good at being a fuckboy. Everyone has their talents.
I'm saying "I told you so" now so that I don't slow down to say it on the way to grab the fire extinguisher
My autobiography will be 500 pages of the words "I probably should've thought this through" typed over and over.
Randomize
