wake up i wanna do it froggy style
I feel like tequila is Gods way of lighting my fuse to do something awesome
im at that stage where all she has to do is cough or something and it pisses me off
Have you resumed life with the rest of the world yet or are you still huddled in the fetal position while wearing compression gear?
I just had my first boner in 64 days today....glad to find out my fluids are still pumpin
There are 27 signatures on my ass. What the hell happened last night?
Every time someone made a cup you congratulated them by letting them sign your ass.
WHY IN THE FUCK DID YOU LET ME DRUNK PUNCH STEVE? HE IS SUCH A NICE GUY!
If it involves mee putting on a bra and discontinuing my 11 am drinking my answer is a polite fuck YOU
Get your clothes on you are our DD for the night. The usual three way payment
Dude, I traded weed for crunch berries. Happy Thursday.
I think about him when I masturbate so I guess you could call it love
I got home at 1 am on a weeknight with lube in my hair. I'd say it was a successful first date.
The shrooms were awesome. Everyone's bones in their face looked so beautiful! Everyone had great face structures.
I know we agreed to cock block each other from now on buttt I WANT this one. I have felt his penis, it is godly, and I am going to have it inside of me, so shut the fuck up and leave.
hey, just so we're clear, next time we go swimming drunk at my house, we have to use the floating chairs instead of my mattress. i'm not sure how to get it out of the pool.
Randomize
