Nothing too bad. Lost a stuffed horse on a stick and tore my clothes off. Again.
i just heard one Asian kid say to another, "i bet if i could get into Harvard i could get laid all the time, my brother lost his virginity the first night there."
My dinner last night was 3000 calories of beer. Slept kneeling on the floor w/ my head on a couch
wanna get hammered and throw tomatoes at the people standing in line for the midnight showing of harry potter and yell whichcraft is evil
so, what part of "he's slept with a guy" do you not understand?
We just took turns doing keg stands. 27 is way too old for this. Out of 5 of us, our best time was 9 seconds.
there's no excuse to just assume your pants won't be coming off for some reason or another. that's just irresponsible
Waking up with a sore back because you put the team on it for jager pong all night
Hope you don't mind if I never tell my family about you.
I wish to strangle
whoa there darth vader
I just want to slap everyone in the face that's happy being sober. Loser.
How ironic... opening your legs for closure.
I've run into almost every guy I've ever slept with today. It's like they know just how horny I am.
Sorry I drunk. I wouldn’t eat those pancakes. I think I put glitter in them.
holy shit! you were walking down a hill and just happened to be passing a trash can like 4 ft away and projectile vomited over a fence into the trash can. kept walking and drank a beer.
Randomize