The girl in the car behind me just took a bowl hit. I miss college.
I need to stop researching the drugs I do on Wikipedia. The parts about abuse and dependency hit too close to home
he aimed his bare ass at the sparkler, farted, and it really did work...i love 4th of july anal fire works
He dated me before I started drinking. I feel like he deserves a consolation bj for all the effort he had to put in to get in my pants.
Wedding cake is always the best dance partner. In the corner. With a jack and coke. And while I'm crying. Listening to "Almost Paradise".
I just looked at the guy in the car next to me and he was wearing a divers mask. We just nodded cause we both understood.
I mean it was like cry my eyes out or masturbate in my moms bathroom.
One of us will probably end up wearing nothing but glow/ neon body paint and a pair of water wings...
And I am in no way ashamed to say that it will most likely be me. I'm hoping for it actually.
I'm pretty sure "tag teaming" and "looking for stability" are not synonymous.
Not yet.
Who takes their shirt off at the bar?! Classy broad
I do. In all fairness there was someone else's blood on it.
You can't text people with drinkers' regret at 8 in the morning. It's just bad form.
I went with plan f. get drunk and start a fire in my yard
Oh god establish a safe word
I'm going to! Pineapple.
Sustenance and doggy style.. the only two things I need
I’m going to have to rewatch all of them. Drugs, man.
Randomize