Should I ask him to prom mid fuck? That way he has to say yes.
walking home from your place the other day I saw a man with a ponytail sitting on some church steps petting a plant
he should get drunk with us
Made out with me girlfriend while she was peeing. all time high, or all time low?
it's like iHOP with fire
since we're both too lazy to go to each others house, you drink there, i'll drink here and we'll skype. it's the same thing.
Well if I fail my finals for being drunk on Cinco De Mayo there is always next year to graduate.
You said that last year...
God you better not be texting me after just having sex with someone from craigslist
If she's telling you consent laws theres probably a reason
Its not even 10am and we are talking about what guys assholes we would finger.
yea, there's something about a stripper whipping you with your own belt that makes you think
well in the interest of full disclosure I have been using a used kfc spork as a buttscratcher for a month
Just saw a man in a motorized chair roll by drinking a beer. It's 9:45 AM. I love Louisiana.
I am the only person I know ever to have been brought TO the bar in the back of a cop a car. Twice.
IM HAMMERED AND JUST HAD CHEESECAKE THAT MADE ME FEEL LIKE NO MAN HAS EVER MADE BE FEEL BEFORE.
I texted her that I burned my tongue drinking coffee so it hurt to talk or kiss... How many points do I get for doing her without talking or making out first?
Randomize
