You work out of a Hotel?
Just saw a policeman use his lights to go through a red light only to turn them off and go to Sonic...
I just want you to know that me val and amanda are drinking on top of a hill lookig at the chicago skyline drinking icehouse and we just peed in public.
the way i see it, im about one adderall binge away from graduating
I'm inventing beer flavored vodka. This raspberry shit makes me feel like a pussy.
YouTube is recomending me a video on how to make a home made meth bong, what has my life come to?
What can I say? When alcohol is my motivation, I can move mountains.
I just pictured ballsacks being shoveled into the furnace of the Titanic.
I just smoked a bowl alone and took my Zyrtec here's to a full night.
but I'm still not sure how you became more and more fluent in Spanish the drunker you got
SShout out to Barney the Dinosaur for teaching me how to sing the ABCs backward. I just scored a free pitcher.
Just did body shot off a midget. Pretty good start.
if i ever get to the point where i am moaning when i pee, please do the honorable thing and kill me.
You need to get a passport so we can carry our bad decisions over the border
I just bought two 8 Balls of Coke from the chick nurse that stitched my leg together in the ER after my bike accident last summer.
Randomize