There is something about listening to Patsy Cline while pooping that makes the experience so much better.
Omg. Get me out of here. Someone is playing michelle branch.
I swear god or herbie drove my car home
Omg. The strippers are having a batman vs spiderman showdown. Both on stage. Genius.
dude skip the party. it is a fucking post office here
what the hell does that mean?
nothing good but a whole lotta male and packages
No I remember falling down the stairs I just don't remember it hurting.
I was hoping we just happened to wake up naked and I hadn't fucked him.... no such luck.
then he pulled down his pants, and i just stared for about a minute..... i was so confused. i didnt know my cat could have a bigger penis than an 18 year old man.
i cant cry in cvs. not again.
so now that i'm sober i just want to apologize for violating your back seat...... on a brighter note thank you for playing the little mermaid song "kiss the girl," really set the mood.
apparently the last bar didn't like my halloween costume with syringes filled with whiskey
I just showered sitting down with a sippy cup of water in there with me. It took 40 minutes. That hungover.
I hope you gays don't get too crazy after DOMA. Gay divorces aren't any better than straight ones.
its like my brain is a tree and you are those little cookie elves
On the upside, no one went to the hospital! Lex's friend was definitely on fire at one point last night though because he tried to juggle tiki torches. He was shirtless this morning and smelled like a BBQ.
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