North Korea, Best Korea!
things that need to be invented #43: vodka that also acts as birth control.
He kept saying that the puke outside the theater wasn't his and it was all a set up to keep him from partying with the whores. Then he passed out on the sidewalk.
She kept chasing him yelling thief, because he drank some of her drink. That was at 8, it got worse.
Your penis chewing exercise is not working
Legitimate concern. Who am I going to have birthday sex with?
Even with having the shower running and music on everyone could hear the alcohol gods making me sacrifice my dignity and meals from the past week.
They were scared I was going to get lost last night so they dressed me up as Waldo so someone would always find me.
Who showers for four hours?!
It was like a tropical nap.
you stole two subs and a drink from jimmy johns and walked out yelling "get at me bitches"
Came home plastered at 8am. Roommate had hot glued all the ashtrays and various items to their surfaces. Couldn't handle it. Went back to the bar.
I still don't know why she was so offended when I emerged from the bathroom and told her my balls were now clean.
My roommate told me he found me naked in the shower puking and when he asked why I was naked I said "you can't wear clothes in a shower"
I made out with my moms boyfriends son last night. Thanksgiving is gonna be reeeal fun!
That song just makes me wanna take off my top and shake my titties all around the club.
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