Fuck U Mike is a golden god.
Mike give steph back her phone.
The weather is perfect in Seattle right now. Warm enough for girls to not wear bras, but cold enough for me to see them nipping out in the shade.
My Mom bought me a vibrating toothbrush. Maybe this is her way of apologizing for throwing away my other thing that vibrated.
My workout was carrying 2 cases home from the grocery. It's Bowl Week.
I just randomly started counting the number of guys that I've hooked up with that are now gay. 11.
i caught the condom in my mouth.. dont ask me how
i can't decided whether the fact that her nipples are bigger then her palms is a problem or not
i just rememebered i spent like 5 minutes on the ground warming some chicks toes.
Well as our DD it was my responsibility to get us home safely. If that meant strapping you down to the backseat using all 3 seatbelts then so be it.
We blazed in her bathtub. All 5 of us. Not easy bro
May or may not have just lost a contact hanging out Anthony's sunroof. Drunk. Hint: I can only see out of one eye right now.
It's that whole "half Japanese, half asshole" thing. My brother and I have found that people really go for that
I'm studying. And by studying I mean I am laying on my floor drinking boones farm alone. Last two weeks. Fuck it.
336: Dude I lost my.phone Wednesday night at a party and just found it, three days later, on the lacrosse field....what the actual fuck.
You tried to run away last night. The neighbors brought you back.you were in their hot tub again. This needs to stop
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