I'm talking handstands, sex in broad daylight, waking me up in the middle of the night. CRAZY
handstands? WTF?
she was a gymnast
go to hell.
I like you better when you drink
I like you better when I drink too
Having dinner with my dad, watching the news and some AIDS prevention ad comes on. My dad then kindly informs me that he doesn't enjoy the feel of condoms.
It's Monday. What a great day to start the weekend on the week of st. Patricks day
I took the chef home. His dick even tasted like garlic
I don't think we should have started that trash fire
I'm not sure how appropriate a drug deal is while at a wake.
Delete that photo of me. My ass looks WAY to good it in to be on Facebook for everyone to see. You gotta earn that shit.
Drinking wine from a straw at 6:15 in the morning. This is what college does to people.
Did I send you a naked snap the other day with a fat blunt in my mouth with the caption "$1200 bitches!" ?
MY GOD DAMN TV STOPS WORKING EVERY TIME I AM THIS FUCKING HIGH. WHY MUST IT TORMENT ME?!
LMAO I like how "don't worry I'll bring chasers" is your way of assuring things will be ok
The shrooms were awesome. Everyone's bones in their face looked so beautiful! Everyone had great face structures.
i mean ive seen your left buttcheek how much more bro can this get
His idea of hot sex is sticking his finger in my dark star while doing me Missionary style. You can tell he's from the Bible Belt.
Does he smell like BBQ?
Inside and out.
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