Tell LD happy birthday and party like it's $19.99
Recession joke.
Don't make out with my wife yet
I would go down on you faster than GM stock
i'm in the guys across the halls apartment. i think 7 MIP guy wants me. he just got a medical marijuana card. might be worth it.
As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
Yep. About to get on pornhub to spill some Christmas cheer
Pro tip: Don't start playing Bejeweled on Facebook while waiting for your Adderall to kick in. Unless you have the next 9 hours free.
You'll be the guy with the raft that sells burritos on the river. You'd be legendary.
It hits you later. Like when you wake up on the floor under a puzzle later.
Remember when puke and rally meant a good time? Fuck pregnancy
Wrong. I really wanted to see the movie. And she was on top of me like she was riding a mechanical bull. Who am I to complain? I live to serve.
she had a dildo shaped like a dolphin. she will forever be known as Flipper
Considering who their parents are, maybe you should use vodka for the baptism.
all I remember is screming at her "I want you and your tortillas... DEAD"
The ass gains better be worth it
Randomize
