Spotted: jayne dropping her cigarettes in a puddle...then picking them back up and putting them in her pocket. If i ever get that desperate, stop talking to me
It's just like soggy cereal, but cancerous
My Nuvaring birth control makes me queef.
i just threw up repeatedly on the entire entire walk down A1A to the pizza place....then on the way back slipped and fell in it
Stage 55 clinger. not a typo. I cannot even believe this shit.
We need somewhere to take these girls. Otherwise it's a orgy in the Mazda.
Would it be safe to assume you're the one that left my front door wide open and left yourself a trail of jaeger drops to find your way back?
He said he was going to "rock my world". I wonder if he too has a false sense of confidence and accomplishment stemming from a complete lack of honesty from our own female counterparts.
Apparently I texted my high school english teacher asking her to tell me what logical fallacies she taught us three years ago.
Even though we had just had to physically take her off of someones lawn she was peeing on when they came outside, she still insisted on walking unassisted the rest of the way home. It was dignity meets shit show.
Hey, met you at the bar last night. You probably dont remember my name. You and your friends came back to my place, you shattered my window with your fist then dipped. Your gonna need to pay for that.
Thats where this cut came from! Thanks for piecing together the puzzle dude.
Hahahahaha. That's what your stoned ass gets for eating half a bag of processed cheese at 2am.
They think its so cute and admirable that I learned French. BITCH HAVE YOU NEVER HEARD OF GOOGLE TRANSLATE? sexting foreign bitches, there's an app for that
And then he said, "let's have sex and I'll send you home with enchiladas."
He knows whenever I get drunk I'm going to call him and make fun of his major. Its like a reverse booty call.
Hurricane Harvey ruined my dick appt. WTF?!
Randomize
