and then he said that the only reasonable explanation as to why I got swine flu was because all I ever do is join the bandwagon
you convinced me to pee myself because I was wearing dark jeans.
Just saw the first guy I gave head to lose in the french open...some how I feel better that my mistake made it to the same mistake as our relationship, the third round. Don't judge.
I feel uncockblockable...banged her in the bathroom with my iv still in
and do you remember when you were dressing me if i had money in my bra?
So my date night ended with us watching porn with his roommate.
Steve called. He needs me to pick him up. He also asked for a set of his clothes, he can't find them. He is such a strong motivation to stay sober.
CAN I EVER JUST MAKE OUT EITH SOMEONE AND NOT GET FRIEND REQUESTED BY THEM THE NEXT DAY.
Goddamnit, guys. I got lube all over my kindle.
do I look like a person who has full control of their limbs and existence on this plane of reality
Still fucking the ballerina?
She can put her legs behind her head.
Enough said
You can't go around chasing people and screaming JUST LET ME LOVE YOU. We're in a public place.
There is a dude with blue hair and a samurai sword and another dude dressed as Dead Pool. I daresay standard social conventions are not applicable in this environment.
Getting on a bus with a beer pong table. I am proof we can make this campus fun.
Oh shit. My bra is undone and I'm pretty sure I peed on my sandal
Look, I know why you're asking me, but just because I'm gay does not make me a wiki on butt sex. Ask a doctor or you know, the internet like everyone else.
Randomize
