this may or may not be the weed talking, but this is by far the best tasting toothpaste i've ever had
can't come out tonight. went to the bar again last night and the bartender hugged and thanked me so much for my "generosity." I'm intrigued but terrified to see my credit card bill.
whatever sunny in Philadelphia does on Thursday nights, I'm doing all weekend.
a cemetary is a place for people to rest in peace and you just spermed all over their land
I need to stop making out with boys in plain view of half my class.
He looked like Harry Potter. I had to do it.
The family from the blindsided came and talked to us last night. The dad owns 68 taco bells. You would have been so inspired
You are the worst kind of disappointment. The responsible kind.
i caught him jerking off, doing his SAT Prep. forever alone.
The dentist told me I have super glue on my teeth. I'm not blaming you I just want to know how that happened
I am still STD free so as far as I am concerned I never went to panama.
The pigeons can smell the fear
Wtf
That hot guy i showed you guessed my exact bra size. I want to have his tan babies.
I apologize in advance for the number of sex toys drying on the bathroom sink.
I wanna get to the point where I can just send a question mark and get an exclamation point in response
I'm floating on a rainbow and a purple elf is giving me advice. COME NOW!!!
Randomize
