I just did your MASH and your life is pretty unfortunate. Youre marrying the tech guy for love. you live in a shack and you're a hooker and you make $1 a day. you drive a brown limo and you have 7 kids
why did i wake up with a kid named Raphael in my bed this morning?
I dont know but you did call last night to tell me you found the last ninja turtle
Blackout barefoot maybe pregnant
Good decisions....
Just got blue box Mac and cheese things are looking up
they just tried to tell me they weren't big into drugs. A) it was the 70's. B) I've seen the pictures.
Before we started fucking, he laid me on the bed, and asked my what my sleep number was, so that i would be "comfy"
You seriously looked at the house acorss the street and implied that you thought they had nice Easters.
I never kept track of who else he slept with. You think I have the time or the energy to keep track of every dick in my life?
no, i'm currently making the trek across campus to get all my stuff from last night. My ID is in one guys bed, and my camera in another guy's bed.
put me on a leash or i'm going to fuck someone
My arms are sore from holding up pukeahontas for so long
All I've been thinking about for the past 12 hours is sex and SEAWORLD
It's the 3rd day of the year and I've already sucked two dicks. New year same ole me.
bitch i am allowed to be rude i just fought cold hard porcelain with my face
Just had a threesome for the second time in my life. I don;t even enjoy threesomes. Too much effort.
HOW DO THESE THINGS KEEP HAPPENING TO YOU?
hey, i didnt think i could be this stupid either but you dont see ME getting all judgemental about it
Randomize
