I was so drunk i thought Kathy Griffin was funny
So I put about 15 worms in the cuervo bottle. I don't think that's how it works but I feel like hallucinating by 11am
i have my graded calc test (94%) sitting on my empty case of beer next to my desk. this is me winning at college.
at what point last night did we decide it was okay to let me hitch hike to another bar?
I don't care who it's from we're getting blown. It's a 3 day weekend anything can happen
Oh, and I'm only keeping her around till spring. Doing the hunt for cunt is too tough in 12" of snow.
when i saw his roomate the next night he kept openly referring to me as "the girl who orgasms loud" when he would try to get my attention
What do you need? A swimsuit and a liver of steel? What else?
I can't. I drank 10 years off my life last night. I need to reevaluate. Sorry.
Call me something sexy & ethnic. Like jasmine. But mystical too. Like Mermaid Jasmine. And throw Glitter somewhere in there too.
I think you're my mermaid sister. Separated at birth, by sea.
He ripped my sink off my bathroom wall and then threw up in it.
A shark bit my leg in the Gulf of Mexico well me and the T were banging so look for it in the papers
he was really really nice, and I did coke off of his dong that night too
Having random cyber sex while watching to catch a predator just seems wrong.
Randomize
