these two guys are about to go shot for shot with syrup
now he is talking to a potato
What time do you think the pilgrims started drinking? I want to be as accurate as possible.
Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
I need some transition time from spring break.. can we day drink between classes this week?
I don't care if he acts like a don't exist 6 days a week. On the 7th day he makes makes my vagina cry. In a good way. Jesus understands.
Every time a song comes on I get sad if glee has not a cover of it
Upside of a two-day migraine: thanks to a prominent "E" in the middle of every pill, I think we can totally pass off Excedrine Migraine as ecstasy to stupid, drunk freshman. This is totally going to happen. That entrepreneurship course is paying off.
There's a very real possibility that I'll wake up in your uncle's driveway.
I had to smuggle a street sign attached to a 14ft long pole out of my house this morning. The list of reasons for me not to drink just keeps getting longer.
Dude what the fuck...
I woke up in my own bed clutching a key to a Ramada in another state.
Ummm, my mojito just spilled on 2 essays as I'm grading. Who says high schoolers have all the fun?
I was unconscious Saturday for like 6 hours after I passed out on the sidewalks of our nation's capital. Thank you America, for bottomless brunch.
It's a whole movie about Joseph Gordon-Levitt watching porn and having sex... I NEED to own it..
Not as much as my roommate, who is in the middle of one of the pictures throwing a lawn chair at a cop car lol.
He tried to eat me out...through my pants.
Randomize
