i love how cold weather makes identifying sluts easier. is it below freezing? is she wearing a tube top? she's easy.
The guys had to come into the bar bathroom and pep talk us all off the floor
Had a drag queen carry me to the car. So I'm told...
Do you think a former stripper/heroin addict constitutes as a high risk sexual partner?
it's been dubbed the summer of antibiotics
The only good thing about this is that the pharmacy guy will stop trying to add me on Facebook.
Breakfast-of-shame with my mother. I was in half of a sexy Mad Hatter costume. We had artisan bagels and judgement.
My pussy is making all kinds of justifications that my mind would have no patience for if it was still in charge
My god this is going to ruin whatever Vegas left of our souls...
All I remember is laying in that secret hideaway closet, naked, with a beer cowboy hat on and you walking in and sitting down crying because no one would have sex with you
I mean, I Just Had Sex in 4 on her top 25 most played list. That's got to give you some indication
If they were bad they leave that night, if they were good they get a gold star, and if they were great they get invited back. Simple.
I can't believe we really went to walgreens to use their cork opener, bounced and drank a bottle of wine in a sketchy corner...
We have had more Sex in the past 48 hours then we have in the past 3 months. I think it was from me dressing up as Darth Vader.
We've been together for 10 months. These next 2 may be a deal breaker. He has not met the summertime version of me that is so hungover today that I cancelled a meeting with my boss right after she sent me an appreciation note saying I have great work ethic. I have her fooled.
Randomize
