What would you say if someone told you they liked your lips?
Which ones?
If you're ever in Seattle we should Fuck. Or get coffee, whatever.
I've had enough of this chick, she wanted to cuddle after giving me a handjob. I feel like I'm in junior high
My mom just told me to make sure my face isn't on the front cover of the newspaper on 4/21. Challenge accepted
Sorry no. I've already promised my first single hookup to somebody.
Thinking about adopting a 16 yr old here. Her name is Abby and she likes vodka. We've bonded. I need a sober driver n e ways...
I just saw a girl on crutches doing a walk of shame. She is either super dedicated, or her night didn't go as planned.
Finished sriting an apology letter to my liver 2 weeks before st. Patricks game on
First booty call in Europe.. In Barcelona. With a German. In broad daylight.... Is that how they do it here?
I just woke up eating some beef jerky with my cat. I think she opened the bag for us.
I bruised my vagina when I was climbing out of the trash can.
Walked into a bathroom stall to pop an addy for my three back-to-back finals today. Felt like Clark Kent walking into a phonebooth.
I have experienced an excessively hairy ballsack in my mouth...and it was horrifying. I keep feeling it in my mouth now. It's like hairy ball PTSD.
Why did I wake up to a snap chat of myself drinking beer out of a blender?
SUFFER THE WRATH OF THE PISS BAG
Randomize