How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
god please explain to me why there's blood underneath my fingernails AND toenails?!?!
Dude To be completely honest I don't think you want me to.
The visine ive been using for four yrs expired. in sept. of 2001.....i will never question my eye problems again.
How much explanation does bbqsexapalooza need?
The state of Wisconsin is just irresponsible for letting me buy this many fireworks
His hands were made for my vagina.
Today is going to be the longest game of "was that a fart, or do I need to go wipe?" I have ever played. Maybe the most challenging too.
Hi I am too sober and out of rum. Translation: I owe you some beer. Also, get better taste in beer.
debating what would be more effort, turning on to my other side or trying to get myself off with my left hand. that kind of lazy day.
he went to the bathroom at 5am only to come back and squeeze my boob before going back to sleep
We met up and made out in front of an empanada spot, if that's not romance then idk what is.
We got stoned and took selfies with the most perfect lawn
my grocery cart consisted of hershey bars, sour patch kids, starbursts, mayo, 4 frozen pizzas, 4 lunchables, and chips. clearly, i can't do this on my own.
Let’s be real here. NOTHING says Real Adulting like rolling a J on your line of credit paperwork.
I finally selected an outfit that says "I'm not easy" but still shows off the tittays.
Randomize
