I have found the one flaw to the great pride I took as a guy to not have to sit down to pee...having to sneeze while peeing.
I have realized now that neither the top nor bottom of a bunk bed is safe for sex....
Hes flirting with her via the sauce packets at taco bell....... I have no words
Watching the gap toothed girl get more ass than me is almost devastating.
let's just pour the lemonade mix into the soco. cut out the middle man.
whatever buzz i had immediately ended when i saw her run through a sliding glass door
Dear lord though. So much glitter. It's just a big gay explosion and all of my whore muscles hurt.
why can't I meet attractive men at the places I like to hang out? like books a million. or the liquor store.
I just want to be covered in whipped cream and spanked, is that too much to ask?
I seriously doubt I'm gonna be able to properly put your dick in my mouth whilst upside down, but I'm willing to give it my best shot
every time someone would wish me happy birthday I would be like "thanks happy birthday to you too"
Want to come over and dangle your tits on top of me like a skewer?
kick those bitches in the teeth and tell them mama came to party
Sitting beside a stoned cat on the kitchen floor eating cheesecake with my hands...just a struggle
Leave it to my mom and I to turn the hearing into a drinking game.
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